From: <timbenedict@peoplepc.com>

To: <timbenedict@peoplepc.com>

Subject: children's ranch update and tim's musings...

Date: Fri, 23 Sep 2005 13:38:25 -0700

Monday, September 19, 2005

Dear Friends,

So much to say..... where to start.....

I had a man come to me about 2 months ago, dealing with some serious

depression, and ask if he could stay at the ranch in one of the spare cabins

for awhile, work on the ranch with me, and get back on his feet mentally. I

welcomed him and set him up in one of the cabins. We talked far into the

night that first night that he was there, and I found that I enjoyed his

company. I left him a list of things to work on, at his request, the next

day, before I headed into town. When I got home that evening, he had moved

out and moved on. He left me note thanking me for my hospitality, but saying

that he had to drive on, that if he stayed here with me, it was too quiet,

and that he didn't think he could fight off thoughts of suicide any longer

if he stayed, without anyone around (I was driving into Boise at least 3

times a week at that point).

It broke my heart to read his note, and understand the depths of the despair

he felt. And it made me sad too, simply in that I was looking forward to his

company around the ranch. I am still living there alone, and it gets very

lonely sometimes, even though I also enjoy the solitude. And just the fact

that he baled out after promising to help with the project, that hurt too,

because a lot of people have done that. I think that he would have stayed

here if there had just been one other person here fulltime that could have

worked with him and helped keep him company, even just working together on

something. But pray for him though. Chris. He needs God's touch of love in

his life soooo bad. I have not heard from him, nor has anyone else in his

circle of friends. I don't know where he is, or even if he is still alive. I

wonder what else I could have said that night, to keep him from leaving, to

keep him from suicide, but I have to just let him go, and trust that God is

taking care of him, a point that I made very strongly to him that night

while talking. And I pray for him. I hope he is still alive. I hope he has

responded to God's voice in his heart finally. I hope maybe I'll hear from

him again someday....

I am speaking to a group of Hispanic Pastors tonight that are interested in

the potential of the ranch to meet some of the Hispanic churches of Treasure

Valley needs for retreat, conference, and campground facilities. I am

seriously excited about that possibility, and am fasting today, praying that

God's hand be on the meeting tonight, and that HIS will comes out of it.

Pretty exciting really :-)

The weather is turning unseasonably cold up at the ranch already. But even

in that, God has been showing himself faithful, taking care of little

details so that I can still function, even though I again have not had a

chance to adequately prepare myself or the ranch for winter yet...

In response to prayer recently, someone donated a big 150 watt solar panel

to the ranch so that I can maybe start to function using the computer for

all the work I do everyday, without having to buy gasoline every day for the

generator (we could actually use several more panels as well if you have old

ones that you are not using anymore). I have simply not had a chance or the

time to tear the diesel generator apart yet to fix the seals and (possibly)

bearings that have gone out in it. Praise God for that one (the solar

panel)!

Pray I can get the diesel generator fixed too.

It has been very beautiful up here with the beginning of fall happening.

What

a glorious time to be alive :-) .

I have had steady work lately, working from home, to the point that I can

actually start to budget, meet my financial obligations, and pay off some

debt. Nonetheless, I am still very behind on ranch rent, and other personal

debts, that I am struggling to catch up with. I am just thankful that God

has given me work... Now if I could just focus ON that work instead of

dealing with broken generators, etc and so forth!!!! *sad chuckle*

Myself and several other people, along with my pastor, have begun a new

church in Clear Creek up here. That is going cool. I am leading worship for

them, and will be working with the youth as well. It's kinda exciting

really.... Clear Creek Fellowship is the name we are currently playing

with.... Pray for that as well.

The grant and organizational paperwork for the ranch is ALMOST DONE!!!!

Yippee! I hate paperwork. But I guess God thought I needed to get over

that.... *chuckle*. Several hundred pages of stuff later, I have most of the

paperwork for the ranch ALMOST ready to file!. Oh what a feeling! Articles

of Incorporation, Bylaws, Business Plan, non-profit status application,

Public Relations materials, Purchase Agreement, supporting documents... Pray

that I can finish in a timely manner (ASAP!)

Friday, September 23, 2005

This week has been one of lots of ups and down emotionally. Because of all

the God things happening (keep reading ;-) ), the darkness is also stepping

up its attacks. This week has been rough, in lots of way. Lots of things

have happened that are not worth going into, but that have pushed me close

to despair more than once. But I am hanging in there. And I would rather

talk about the victories anyway, so that is what I will focus on today,

because God is good and I want to glorify Him.

The Hispanic Pastor's Association meeting on Monday night went VERY well. I

asked God to help me remember enough Spanish to get by, and I was amazed at

how much I could follow. Not everything, but almost. I had to sit back and

think about it, that it has been 20 yrs since I was in Ecuador, South

America where I first learned Spanish. Wow..... Where does the time go?

But the meeting was very good. I understood most of what was happening, and

when it came time for me to speak, I stumbled along in Spanish for a minute

before someone kindly offered to translate for me. Then I was ok. But I

briefly presented the ranch, and what I want to do with it, and it touched

them. I also gave them several copies of the almost finished business plan.

Apparently they have been praying for a long time for a place like this to

participate in. So it sounds like for one of their future association

meetings, they want to come up here, and get a full tour, and everything.

Kinda cool. I am looking forward to it. I am looking forward to exploring

how we can partner together to use this place to reach their youth, provide

them with retreat facilities, etc and so forth.

There was also a young lady there, a friend of someone in the group, that

came up to me afterwards, asking lots of questions and telling me that she

has been wanting to be involved in a place like this for a long time (the

camping, the youth, etc and so forth), and that she had been praying about

it, and even planning some retreat events and looking for a venue. So we

made arrangements for her to come up and tour the place. While here touring

the place with me, when she walked into the conference room, she said she

almost started crying because she had had several dreams going back over a

year, about THAT conference room. She didn't elaborate, but it was very cool

to sense that distinct fingerprint of God in her life. I had to chuckle. I

am almost not surprised anymore when someone tells me that God had placed

this place on their hearts or in their dreams before they had ever met me.

But it is VERY cool. It is VERY exciting to be a part of something this big,

that God is so obviously working in and doing. He will take care of me as I

do His will. I am holding on to that.

Ironically enough, it was in this same conference room wherein I first felt

the call of God concerning this property, over 3 years ago when I first

checked the place out. God has got something very cool and very big up his

sleeve concerning this place.

There is another couple that I have known but not interacted much with, from

the Robie creek church, that also came up to tour the place last Sunday, and

apparently, God had also given them dreams and visions about this place

somehow, so much so that they were floored when they walked through the

place with me. It was very cool. *chuckle*. What was even funnier, is that

they were also at the Hispanic Pastors meeting Monday, and apparently, God

had revealed to them that they would be working with a "big house"

somewhere. When they toured the ranch here Sunday, they thought it might be

here that God was calling them (they did not share any of this with me until

later). But it wasn't until the pastor's meeting, when I wrote the ranch

website address on the white board at the front of the room, that it all

made sense to them (http://www.bighouseministries.com). They both just

started laughing right outloud in the meeting and had to explain it to me

and everyone. It was very very cool *chuckle*.

I tell ya, it's very cool to be a part of something this big.... :-)

It's also very scary.

My pastor and I recently began to sort out the stored foodstuffs here at the

ranch, that are part of the property being transferred. We were astonished

to find several tons of grain, sugar, beans, rice, and other staples. My

eyebrows went up over that one... (anyone have a spare flour mill that they

don't need anymore?)

In January of this year, I sent out a short little news item to a number of

my prayer supporters. Read it here.

http://timbenedict.grp1.com/children/news/jan52005.htm . Then more recently,

I mentioned in one of my main newsletters a dream I had had recently (July)

that sobered me greatly. Read it here.

http://timbenedict.grp1.com/children/news/july182005.htm . Both things seem

too coincidental to not be related to Hurricanes Katrina/Rita in some way.

There is within my spirit, a deep sense of urgency, and almost foreboding,

about the future. And after realizing what I saw and felt before Katrina, I

have to share this heaviness on my heart.

We need to be focused on reaching out to people, because time is short.

People will be coming to us for answers in the midst of chaos. We here in

the Northwest are not immune to natural and manmade disasters. It happened

in New York on 9-11, out of the blue. It happened in Florida, with several

hurricanes right in a row last year. They weren't ready. It happened in New

Orleans, and they didn't expect anything either. It's happening in Texas

right now. Something, anything, COULD happen here as well. Are we as

Christians ready? Are our houses in order? Are we praying for and reaching

out to people now? Are we ready to reach out to people when our own physical

worlds collapse? Are you prepared mentally, physically, and spiritually, to

not only stand tall and strong if/when you yourself lose everything, but to

also stand strong and tall, as a lighthouse on a rock, for other people to

come to, and seek God from?

There are a growing number of Christians that I talk with, that feel this

same sense of urgency that I feel, overshadowing us. That we need to be

turning our homes into sanctuaries for people to find God. That we need to

be

focused on the ministry of reaching out to hurting people, and that God is

going to bring many people to our doorsteps that we need to be ready for. I

cannot describe what I feel. And it is not just me alone, but others as

well, that as we have come together and shared, we have all been feeling the

same thing.

Please don't take me wrong. I am not a doomsday prophet. But God DID warn

Joseph in a dream of 7 coming years of famine, and Joseph wisely and

carefully prepared, and in so doing, saved the messianic line from

extinction. I can't help but think that God is going to bring a LOT of

people to our various doorsteps, and soon, and that we need to be ready to

minister to both their physical and spiritual needs. Can you say that you

are as prepared as Joseph was? I cannot describe the incredibly deep sense

of urgency I feel (and have felt for a while now) about time being short,

and that I need to be about my Father's business, reaching out to people

right now, getting this place operational, and being ready to reach out to

them in the future. We are out of time.

Truly we serve an awesome God. I am SO glad that I know Him, that He chose

to walk with me, and that I have invited Him/Jesus into my heart and life,

asked forgiveness for my screwups, and told Him that He was king of my life

now. If I didn't know the creator of the universe, and didn't know that He

loved me and that I would be with HIM when I die, if I didn't know all those

things, I would either be a mental basket case or a narcissistic sociopath,

with all the stuff happening around us right now. Not cool. I truly wish

more people knew Him and His touch and His fingerprints in their lives. They

would be so much happier and more content. People need Him. Are we living so

that people can see that for themselves? When was the last time someone

asked you, because of the way you live your life, why you were so different,

or if you were an angel? People have asked me both things, so I know that

what I ask is not unreasonable. And if people, as human as I am with all my

failures and vices, they can still see enough of a difference in how I live

that they would ask me those 2 questions and leave the door wide open to

share, what might happen if more Christians started to live like that, and

with more dedication than I have? When I look at some of the martyrs down

through the years, people who have truly lived their lives for God, so much

that they gave their lives for Him, I feel pretty pathetic really. Where are

the heroes of faith, like those of old, that we can look up to? Is there

anyone in your world that considers you a hero of faith? Stand up! Be

counted! Be willing to step out on the edge for God, because that is the

only place in the universe where you will see His miraculous power truly

displayed in a daily, supernatural way. Live a life that is so characterized

by Christ and His love that people literally ask you, not once or twice like

they have me, but EVERY DAY, if you are an angel. What will it take for

you/us to reach that level of commitment to Him?

Whew!

I need to go as I have an appointment to make and a deadline to meet. So I

am just going to sign off now as I did with my Katrina email mentioned

above....

A voice in the Mountains.....

-Tim Benedict

21 yellowpine ln

Boise, Idaho 83716

208-392-6723

timbenedict@peoplepc.com

http://www.bighouseministries.com